Wednesday, June 23, 2010

"Why are You so Damn Fat!?"

I don't know about you, but I have been asked this question at least a dozen times a day since the time I was about eleven. I have been belittled, criticized, mocked, scolded and generally abused. That's a whole lot of abuse!

I didn't realize, on a conscious level, that it was even happening until I picked up Martha Beck's book The Four Day Win on the recommendation of a friend who has lost 100 lbs. Those of you who know me know I'm a huge fan of Martha Beck primarily because she's blunt, honest, extremely intelligent, well-educated and basically knows what the hell she's talking about.

I slipped on my headphones and switched on my iPod to find my way to a thinner me and the first words out of her mouth were, "Why are you so damn fat!?"  Her point was not to belittle me, after all it's rare that in real life anyone would say such an unkind thing to another human being (except perhaps our parents or siblings!). Her point was that we say exactly those kinds of things to ourselves, over and over and over, day in and day out, year in and year out, not only about our appearance but behavior and choices as well. We are not our own best friend ~ in fact, we're probably worse than our worst enemy! Why wouldn't we soothe our wounded selves with a half gal of ice cream! (Incidentally, did you know ice cream doesn't even come in half gallons anymore! That was not nice of the manufactures at all! ~ Yes, I am an addict. <--- See? I just did it!)

What we tell ourselves day in and day out, in our constant stream of mental gibber jabber, is far too often not only not nice, but not one bit helpful!  Martha doesn't mince words. In The Four Day Win she also comes right out and says what most of us think, "really people, who doesn't know the basics of weight loss? Eat less. Move more. That's all there is to it!" It's not about the "perfect diet" or the "right exercise routine", although they can be very helpful tools, it's about the way we think and what we tell ourselves consciously and unconsciously.

It's time to figure out what is going on inside our heads and in this book Beck promises to help us do it. I'm ready to see if she's right! Care to join me?

The Four Day Win is also available on CD and downloadable MP3 for your iPod. (I really like this website and their prices are good - Learn Out Loud.)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

As your friend who has now lost 110 pounds, I so understand what Martha is teaching. I have struggled with weight since I was 12 and my mother told me " you have a cute figure if you just don't get fat." Well I did and I struggled. We are self disciplined and strong, now it's time to let go and listen to our bodies and our rational mind. I know you can loose as can every other woman out there.

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